372 Pages We'll Never Get Back

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Mike and Conor are back in the CozQuiltPlasVerse (still haven’t fully shaken the last book…) You know what that means: Longarms are mastered by devastatingly handsome ex-law enforcement agents. Jeopardy is watched while things happen. Character names fly at you like fake snowflakes on the set of Hot Frosty.

Plus, Mike and Conor go head-to-head in Real or FanFic, we read some mail and we go through the Dumb Sentences of the Week.

Assignment: Read thru Chapter 17

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It’s cozy season! It’s cruise season! Wait, can it be BOTH??

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If you supported the podcast on Patreon you’d have already been cozy for a week because we post every episode there a week early! Plus we have another ENTIRE PODCAST on there where we try to solve old Encyclopedia Brown mysteries, sometimes with special guests! https://patreon.com/372pages

Jonathan’s song: 372pages.com/recapsong.mp3 and all the images we discuss in this episode: https://imgur.com/a/RjzYnWN

ASSIGNMENT: Read thru Chapter 9

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Support the podcast on Patreon where you can hear our latest attempts to solve insane Encyclopedia Brown mysteries with special guests Alex Schmidt, John Hodgman, and David Roth! https://patreon.com/372pages

Finally, the most pressing questions are answered: who is Mrs. Juneanne Stackpoole? Will Anselmo be as big a character as we always assumed? What’s the latest from the Thelwell Brokerage Services?!

Oh, also, though it doesn’t matter or count in the least, the Real of FanFic, Mike v. Conor is tallied.

Plus some listener mail and Dumb Sentences of the Week.

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Support the podcast on Patreon, where you get every episode early as well as all the other fun stuff we talk about on these eps! https://patreon.com/372pages

We have what you all crave: tantalizing new facts about Sid. Also, without noting it we meet what we have to imagine is the 750th character in this relatively short book.

Dumb Sentences join our final Real or FanFic of this book, and, at long last, the full clip that should put to rest the eternal question, “Who is Jim Dalen?”

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We’ve kept you waiting long enough: time to find out the moisture level of Sid’s facial hair and to name the implement or implements he uses to groom it. Also, our experimental Real or FanFic continues to go swimmingly / terribly, depending on whether you’re Team Conor or Team Mike.

ASSIGNMENT: Read thru Chapter 31

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Support the podcast on Patreon so you can hear our recap of the previous 7 books in the series, Encyclopedia Brown mysteries, and all the other stuff we talk about in this episode! http://patreon.com/372pages

So many characters! Why?

Ok, we’ve calmed down now. We’re back in the Tek-verse. We’re happy, I wouldn’t hesitate to say, to be here.

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READING ASSIGNMENT: Read through Chap. 21

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If you were on Patreon this would be old news because we announced it there a week ago! Support the podcast here: patreon.com/372pages

The new book is announced! Since it is one of a series, we bring everyone up to date with excerpts of previous books AND Mike tells another story about his dad (squeamish discretion advised.)

Get the book here but no peeking ’til you’ve heard us reveal it! https://amzn.to/3Y6dS0z (affiliate link)

ASSIGNMENT: Read thru Chapter 11

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Our final episode of Ernest Cline’s Bridge to Bat City and it may not surprise you learn that Cline wraps everything up in exactly the way you’d expect him to.

There’s a lot of Listener Mail, including some pretty good theories #cough harperlee cough trumancapote#, as well as a load of Dumb Sentences, and statistics on Mike’s Real or Fanfic.

But to start it all off, many people wrote in with some truly stunning news ripped right from today’s headlines. (I don’t think we’ve EVER had anything quite this on the nose before.)

NOTE: We had some minor audio issues (blame on some new gear in Mike’s rig.) so we’ll make it up to y’all with a Bonus tbd. Thanks.

Alejandro’s updated artwork

Bat researcher Merlin Tuttle crying

 Jonah’s statistics

 Opal’s “cameo” in Slacker

 Jacob’s list of kids books from 1927: https://372pages.com/kidsbooks.pdf

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Don’t be a Muckerno, support the Podcast on Patreon! Get every episode a week early, plus a ton of other bonus stuff that we don’t put on the free feed! https://patreon.com/372pages

Shocking – truly SHOCKING – news that will shake up the 372 community almost as much as the scandal surrounding our last cozy mystery. Not since Will Smith slapped Chris Rock at the Academy Awards while that guy streaked across the stage behind David Niven has there been anything this “watercooler-talk-worthy” (<—— huh, kids? 8 year-olds, you’re eating this up, aren’t you?)

Mike and Conor continue to delve into the story of Opal and how she can communicate with bats because she was sucked up into a UFO, and now she rambles (i.e., “drives around in a car”) with her uncle Roscoe, a serious loser who destroyed his family farm, owes thousands in back taxes, and sneaks into alleys behind music clubs so he doesn’t have to pay the seventy-five cent cover charge.

All the departments are here and as a final reading assignment, FINISH THE BOOK!

(And yes, Mike forgot that a kind listener had already done a “We Didn’t Start the Fire” parody. Could we have edited it out? Sure, but why not mock him instead?)

Gallery of illustration “similarities” submitted by Jay: https://imgur.com/a/wUajGQP

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Support the podcast on Patreon! Get every episode early, plus hear Mike’s Bat Story, Conor’s Paul Harvey tapes, an entire bonus podcast about Encyclopedia Brown and more! https://patreon.com/372pages

Bats can read! Or they can’t! But we know they spread mojo which causes people to groove. That’s just science.

Mike does Real or Fanfic (“does” in this context means “participates in”), we have Dumb Sentences, and we read some mail!

Finally, a reminder from the CDC: Bats are the leading cause of rabies deaths in people in the United States. People and domestic animals should avoid contact with bats. Bats should never be kept as pets. Rabies can spread to people from bats after minor, seemingly unimportant, or unrecognized bites or scratches.

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ASSIGNMENT: Read until the sentence “And that’s how Opal and the bats made friends with Richard Linklater and Lee Daniel and helped out the crew of Slacker, one of the best films ever made about Austin and the people who live there.”

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