In this episode we’ve got some diabolical fan fic, confusion about what constitutes a cyborg, and we’ll finally hear from the man behind the ghostwriter himself. For next time, read thru episode 21!
To the inattentive and brainless layman* it might appear that not much happened during this stretch of TekWar. Mostly Jake aka Jonatha and Juanito aka The Android(???) just sat and talked to people about other people we haven’t met yet. Somehow, we discussed this for nearly two hours.
Folks stepped up their fanfic this time around, probably due to the new conditioner they’re using that leaves their hair bouncing around at all times for some reason. We also sort out how Jake could be puzzled (twice!) by the term kamikaze, guess characters exact ages and weights, and give credit where credit is due to a scene that actually made us laugh.
We’ll take a little extra time off for Thanksgiving, but we hope to have something extra up for Patreon supporters! To those of you celebrating, have a great turkey day! If you feel like joining our Giving Tuesday campaign for 826 National, it’s available here. Thanks to everyone who has chipped in so far!
For next time, read thru Chapter 15.
*I grinned as I found myself recognizing the turn of phrase from the classic 80s-90s comic strip Calvin and Hobbes
A hearty plasthanks to our Patreon supporters, who get early access to every episode and just last week, got to hear an alternate version of our Tekwar intro episode! If you’d like to join them, you can chip in a a few bucks a month at patreon.com/372pages
Please keep sending in emails and fanfic. For next time read thru Chapter 11!
Let’s not delay this any longer: We’ve got a new book picked out to read together, and by all accounts it’s gonna be a doozy. So let’s say goodbye to Norgolia and move on to… Well, you’ll have to listen to find out!
We didn’t know the assignment for MYSTERY BOOK REDACTED when we recorded, but now we do: read thru Chapter 7, that’s page 54 in our version.
Please email us your thoughts on the new book, as well as any fanfic you might cook up in your twisted little brains. And if you care to, support us on Patreon! They’ve already known about this book for days and raided their local stores for the cheapest used copies! patreon.com/372pages
We’ll also take a look at how the book’s love scenes translate to the audio book format, read your emails, and award the dumb sentence of the week. Plus, we’re very pleased to report that this podcast has been deemed the winner of the Jay T. Rikosh award for excellence! And our next book should be arriving in the mail this weekend, so stay tuned!
We teased it in our last episode, but we’re finally ready to reveal to you: our next book is called The Eye of Argon. We figured, what could possibly carry the torch of Ernest Cline’s terrible books, and decided: how about a typo-riddled fantasy novella written five decades ago by a sixteen year old who never published anything again?
The Eye of Argon by Jim Theis is obscure, but it is available in print (VERY curious what the publisher makes of the sudden spike in sales!) Fortunately, it’s also available in every ebook format known to man right here. And if you want a true window into madness, check out the scan of the original issue of the Ozark SF Association “magazine” it appeared in.
The Eye of Argon is mercifully short, so you could probably read the whole thing in one sitting, but for our next episode we’re only going to read thru the first four chapters. Yes, that includes chapter 3.5. No, we don’t know why there are multiple “half” chapters.
Email us your thoughts and fanfic at email@example.com And if you’re interested in supporting our patreon, you can do that here: patreon.com/372pages You’ll get early access to our episodes (Patrons have known the book title since Tuesday!) and the warm feeling that you’re helping make nonsense like this happen!
We are back! Don’t worry, there is no new Ernest Cline book. But we’ve decided to launch back up to try to tackle some books which may be just as bad or even worse!
DO NOT GET TOO EXCITED! There’s no real content in this episode. It is just A Crummy Commercial for our new Patreon. We ran afoul of the International Podcast Council for A) not having a Patreon and B) not reading commercials for MeUndies. We’re risking a lot by still refusing to do B, but if you’d like to support our Patreon, we’d really appreciate it! For just a few bucks a month you can get early access to episodes, like the episode that reveals OUR NEXT BOOK TITLE which is currently available for patrons RIGHT NOW!
All episodes will still be available for free on this same feed, just a few days after the patreon subscribers get them. So check back here in a few days!
Recorded live at Sisyphus Brewing in Minneapolis on April 11th, this is our first ever live show… Is how this post used to start before the recording of our live show was lost in an epic tech meltdown!
But never fear, Mike and Conor have reunited to rediscuss the Ready Player One movie, in possibly more depth than even the original discussion! Did it live up to the expectations of the gunter faithful? Or did Spielberg pull a Pendergast? Most importantly: Were there any Battletoads cameos??
Thanks to everyone who came out to the actual live show, and to everyone who encouraged us to share our thoughts even after the disappointment of losing the first recording. Mike will be reprising the first half of the live show on Like Trees Walking, available shortly. And as always, Conor’s Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe novel is available on Kindle and in Paperback.
When we last left Zack Lightman, he was submerged beneath the Antarctic Ocean, trying to retrieve his father and save the world. But then it was getting close to happy hour, so Ernest Cline decided to just wrap things up and hit publish on one of the most unsatisfying, unbelievably rushed endings we’ve ever seen. We’re talking about an ending where cancer is cured IN ONE SENTENCE, and then the fact that MOST OTHER DISEASES were also cured is tacked on as a parenthetical to that sentence.
Conor & Mike are here to talk you through it though, with ruminations on MLB.tv’s playoff feeds, contorted faces, and a leaked scene featuring their new favorite character, The Emissary. Thanks for reading along with us, it’s been a lot of fun!
Since this is the FINAL Armada episode, we’re auctioning off our copies of the books. PLUS, Lucas Antoniak did an original, one of a kind painting of Chuckette, the original inflatable rig cow, that we’re including in the auction. All proceeds will go to 826 National.
Tickets are still available for our live show, April 11th in Minneapolis, but they’re going fast!
Need something to fill the Cline shaped void in your reading schedule? Get Conor’s book, The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe!